I have started this post and deleted it a bunch of times. I must say, it would have been more therapeutic to be writing with pen and paper so I could have wadded up the bad copies and thrown them across the room.
When I started blogging, I received advice from a trusted friend to keep it honest and real, so I want to share it all but I also wanted to keep this blog as positive as race finish lines. Something not so positive is happening now and I was unsure of how or if to share. I was torn on what to do. Then while chatting with Hubby yesterday, he reminded me that sharing my story of recovery from an injury will hopefully provide positive incentive to someone else struggling with their own injuries, so today, I’m sharing.
For the past week and half or so, my right calf has been sore and stiff. Runners know that pain is part of the game so I did what I usually do with bothersome aches. Ice, got off my feet a little more, pulled the training way back, got grumpy and carried on. After a couple days, it was the same. Not going away, not easing up and becoming a real pain in the butt. I continued with light stretching, massaged, pretty much stopped training, got REALLY grumpy and carried on. Yesterday, I woke to a bruise on the back of my calf and more than annoying pain when going up and down stairs. Yikes! Now, after 24 hours of hating the world because I was accepting the fact that running is not going to happen any time soon, I’m sitting with ice on my elevated leg and sharing with you.
I’m not really sure what exactly the injury is, but I do know that taking an extra recovery day isn’t going to fix this one, I need help. I’ve made an appointment with my doctor and until then I’m going to be a big girl and not train. (Please imagine a little toddler sitting in the corner with arms crossed, a big pout on her face and mad eyes peeking out from under a frowning brow because I’m sure that’s how I look as I type that sentence!)
Not training. Well actually – that’s not true! I have decided today that I AM going to train, it’s just going to look different than my typical training.
Athletes have to deal with injury, it is part and parcel of being in a sport. Acknowledged and accepted. (You can imagine that little girl getting up from the corner with a stomp of the foot, taking a deep breath and saying FINE with tons of attitude.)
Athletes have to adapt their training to challenge themselves at the point they are at NOW to reach their future goal. LIGHT BULB MOMENT! I CAN still challenge myself today.
A non-training me would sit her again today watching too much Gilmore Girls on Netflix, eat junk because really, why bother with nutritional shakes at this point, and would waste the day away. The runner in me has decided to do something different. My training may not be logging kilometers and putting reps in on the resistance equipment but it can still exist.
My training today will be challenging. I will get my leg elevated and ice frequently, I will put the effort into eating properly to fuel my healing body, and I will stay positive and take strength from the fact that this is part of the path to the next finish line. The end goal has not changed people! I will not feel broken and weak but determined to be strong again!
….I will read that last paragraph every time I start to slip.
When I’m out doing a run and it’s getting tough and I’m being challenged, I don’t allow myself to think, “OMG, I still have another 2 km to get home, I’m never going to make it!” I play the running mind game and focus on getting to the next telephone poll and when I get there, then the next pole. I have to bite off small pieces that my mind is willing to accept as possible. When faced with this injury, I let my mind win. I was overwhelmed because I was letting too much in, thinking way too much about what I was missing, and all the what ifs in regards to the injury. Today, I’m getting to the next telephone pole and leaving the rest for tomorrow. Today I am training!